Archive for the ‘Bible Study’ Category

• Having Children

  Date: 2010.04.19 | Category: Bible Study, MFM | Response: 0

  Deciding to have a child or children is a sacred decision.  (at first, I had a typo which said “scared” decision. And the decision should somewhat scare you.)   Our society provides many options on the continuum of having children. I’ll briefly discuss a few of the ways we try to control the process of having children.

  Natural method:  without going into alot of details, the natural method would be what the Israelites used.  The man and woman come together only at certain points in the woman’s cycle thereby naturally increasing or decreasing fertility. This method works if you want to have several children and if you are predictable in your cycle.

  Medication:  Modern medicine has provided pills for everything from headaches to…  well you know… Women can choose to take birth control pills, morning-after pills, and even fertility enhancing drugs.  Once pregnant, a woman now may take  medication that can start or stop labor, control nausea, etc.

  Surgery: IVF, D&C, and tubal ligation are just a few of the ways we try to control reproduction.

  Some of these reproductive technologies are great. Some of them are not. Some of them are in line with the Bible, and clearly some of them fly in the face of everything that is right.  I don’t have time to regurgitate what others have written and researched.  If you’re looking for a thought-provoking discussion on bioethics and other women’s health issues, I’ll refer you to Sarah Flashing. I wish I could take the time today to compose a compelling piece on this very complicated topic.  I’m sure I’ll return to this topic eventually.

  In the mean time, Here are some self-evaluation questions:

  1. Do you see children as a blessing from the Lord? or are they inconvenient?

  2. Do you trust God with the timing of having children? Or do you want to schedule your family growth?

  3.What are your biggest fears concerning children?

  Questions not to ask:

  1. Am I ready for children?  I’ll answer that one: NO you are not. Parenting is a sacred adventure for which we are never completely ready.  We may believe we have arrived on a higher plane of spirituality and thus are ready for children, but find out once they are born there is an entire “closet of skeletons” to deal with– your own sinful depravity runs deeper than you know. We are sinful people giving birth to sinners and God uses the process of parenting to refine our character like a silversmith refines precious metal.  Read Sacred Parenting for more on this line of thought.

  2. What if I have twins? I’ll answer that one: You’ll be extremely busy.  If you’re already busy, then you’ll re-align your priorities and learn to delegate.  While the incidence of twins is on the rise, several factors contribute to having twins. Maternal age (extremes on both ends). Number of pregnancies (completed or not). Family history. Medical intervention.  All of these play into the gamble of having or not having twins.  But the real reason people have twins is that God is the author of life, and sometimes he gives a double blessing.   God wants us to fully rely on him no matter how many children we have at one time. Don’t avoid having a baby just because you’re afraid of having twins.  Go back to the questions above, and think about your fears. Then commit the whole matter to God through prayer.

  3. Can I afford children?  Don’t ask this.  You can’t afford it.  You’ll have to make sacrifices. Whether it’s staying home, not going to the theater, cancelling cable, refusing to get a manicure/pedicure at the spa, choosing to eat at home, going to the library instead of buying or renting, emailing long lost friends for a free vacation at their house, growing your own food, or biking instead of driving, you will have to make sacrifices–Lots of them–Daily,Weekly, for the rest of your life.  God will challenge us to sacrifice everything near and dear to us in order to deepen our relationship with Him.

• Where is my cart and where is my horse?

  Date: 2010.03.23 | Category: Bible Study, personal | Response: 0

  A man makes his plans but the Lord orders his steps

  Go to now you who say, we’ll go here and there and make a profit.

  Some of my readers know I am considering re-entering the work force.  At this writing I do not feel I should give any more details than that. but let me tell you, I’m having a hard time with the whole horse/cart thing.

  The saying goes, “Don’t get the cart before the horse.”  It’s difficult for me to remain in the waiting loop with regard to this potential job, especially since it initially seems that the Lord is thrusting me into this position.  I’ve lost sleep over this — anticipating my first day on the job and all the wonderful phone calls I’ll be making, how each day will unfold, how everything and everyone will grow and change.  I feel I am ready yet simultaneously I know I will never be ready to accept a job of this magnitude.  I am like a horse — with no cart attached — raring to go full bore to the finish line.  I am Seabiscuit, electric with anticipation of the race.  Yet, I know I cannot win this race alone. I need to be less like Seabiscuit and more like Black Beauty, the cab horse.  I need to submit to the driver, and have a cab, coach or cart attached.  Otherwise, I’ll have no business.  I need to have the right driver or I’ll be crushed near to death from the load that I’ll carry.

  So, I’m spending this night in prayer.  I used to wonder how in the world Jesus could pray all night, or why he would want to.  I’m catching a glimpse of possible reasons.  I have my plans but I want to leave those in the Hand of God for His divine purpose to order and establish.

• The Blessing: Hit or Miss

  Date: 2010.03.08 | Category: Bible Study, MFM | Response: 0

  I’ve been reading The Blessing .  See theblessing.com for more information on the book. The first 15 chapters of the book focus on defining the blessing and how to impact those around us with the blessing.

  But giving a blessing can be hit or miss. Our next chapter will talk about how people miss the blessing from their parents. In the movie Barbie presents Thumbelina, Makena is the classic example of a girl who is seeking the approval and blessing of everyone around her and mostly missing it.  Makena’s parents are so busy working their careers that they have little time for their daughter, although they tout, “Anything for you dear, just ask.”   The scenario proves that showering a child with gifts and satisfying every whim won’t make up for blessing the child with a unique message for a special future.  Because her parents aren’t meeting those deep needs, Makena seeks approval from her peers using any means of manipulation to win.  The fierce battleground of junior high girl popularity brings out the worst in her spoiled peers and is the crucible that reveals Makena’s true character.

  In our discussion, we’ve been talking about how to bless our children.  But it’s not just our children who need affirmation. God puts people in our path all the time who need a blessing from Him through us.  At the beginning of the movie, a series of unfortunate events result in Thumbelina and her friends getting transported to Makena’s apartment.  This relocation forces Thumbelina to make friends with someone she would never have spoken with otherwise.

  Thumbelina challenges Makena’s notion of friendship and blesses her by saying, “I’m glad we are friends.”  Thumbelina can see that Makena is at a crossroads and needs a higher purpose for her life than one-upping her peers.  Thumbelina’s simple blessing affirming their friendship transforms Makena from a self-seeking spoiled brat to a young woman who has a purpose that reaches beyond her four walls.

  Psalm 67 reads,

  ” ¹ May God be gracious to us and bless us
  and make his face shine upon us,
  Selah

  ² that your ways may be known on earth,
  your salvation among all nations.

  ³ May the peoples praise you, O God;
  may all the peoples praise you.

  ⁴ May the nations be glad and sing for joy,
  for you rule the peoples justly
  and guide the nations of the earth.
  Selah

  ⁵ May the peoples praise you, O God;
  may all the peoples praise you.

  ⁶ Then the land will yield its harvest,
  and God, our God, will bless us.

  ⁷ God will bless us,
  and all the ends of the earth will fear him.”

  When we bless that person that God has put into our life, they in turn can bless others.  Ultimately, we seek the blessing so that God may be glorified, not just so that we feel good.   Who has God put into my life for the purpose of blessing so that s/he can glorify God?  Let me not miss the opportunity to bless others. May God give me the words that hit deep in the spirit so that He can begin the transforming work of sanctification.

• The Blessing: MFM

  Date: 2010.02.20 | Category: Bible Study, MFM, Twins | Response: 0

  I know today is Saturday, but I’m inspired to write Monday’s post early.

  Most of the ladies in my small group in MOPS have been reading The Blessing.  This book provides an interesting perspective on the blessing that Isaac pronounces over his twins.  (Genesis 27)  The book breaks down the speech to reveal five basic elements of the blessing and the conversations that have come out of this book study has been very insightful and wonderful.  For more information, click here.

  I think I have a unique perspective to bring to the group because I, like Isaac, have twins.  When Rob and I brought the girls home from the hospital, we had no clue.  We knew a lot about the Bible and about parenting, but we really had no clue.  It is difficult sometimes to see past the immediate and into the future.   Babies are floppy when they are first born and it’s hard to hold and snuggle two of them at once, and feed them both simultaneously with a syringe.  So, Rob took one and I took one.  We sort of “assigned” a baby to each parent.  And to this day, the child assigned to me in the beginning is more easily comforted by me than by Rob.

  So when you look at the family dynamics and start to analyze Isaac & Rebecca’s parenting style, think about how in the world they would’ve dealt with two babies in a tent, trying to keep all those goats from nibbling their fingers. It’s no wonder to me that Isaac’s favorite was Esau and Rebecca’s favorite was Jacob.  What could’ve started off as a matter of survival and sanity probably ended up with one parent having a stronger relationship with one child over the other.

  And for the matter of Jacob stealing the blessing….  Yes, it was deceptive. and Yes, Rebecca acted unsubmissively.  Yet I can understand that there is no “older” and no “younger” when you talk about twins.  Mine were born on the same day, five minutes apart.  Five minutes.  That’s about how long you sit at a stop light, or spend putting on your make up.  Five Minutes.  My twins are the same age, and I don’t think of one being “older” even though one came out first.  So I can understand why Rebecca would want “her baby” to get “the” blessing.  She probably saw Esau and Jacob as equals, with God’s prophecy looming in the back of her mind. I’m sure she questioned why they couldn’t just have simultaneous equal blessings — after all, probably every single other thing the boys had ever experienced had been done together.

  Part of The Blessing is “picturing a special future.”  This is difficult to do, especially at the age the girls are now.  One day they are obsessed with germs, medicine, and body systems, and diagnose their stuffed animals.  “You are going to be a wonderful nurse or vet when you grow up.”  Next day, they show mothering instincts.  Next day, they crank out several pictures — and the detail and use of color is that of a high-schooler.  “One day I’m going to the Chicago Art Museum and I’m going to see your work hanging in the gallery.”  Next day, they are wonderful helpers with housework and cooking, diligently honing their wife skills.

  How do I picture a special future for them when they seem to have “the Midas Touch”?  And how do I give them a special future, when everything they do is together? How do I let them diversify into a unique person without slighting one over the other?  How do I direct them, develop them, disciple them, and educate them both?  How do I affirm one, without ignoring the other?

  I hear Esau’s cry: “Father, is there no blessing left for me? What about me?  Am I blessed too?”  I don’t want to bless the second born lavishly with a well thought out speech, only to be coerced into blessing the first born with some off-the-cuff positive affirmation.  Did Isaac feel this way when Esau brought in the prepared meat?  We know he did.

  I want to bless my girls, and build them up, not to tear them down and discourage them with negative self-fulfilling prophecies.  I want to give each of them a special vision for their future, of what they could be of what they could do and how God might use them for His kingdom.

  This vision is the blessing.

• A Jonah Day

  Date: 2009.11.13 | Category: Bible Study, House, Preschool, Twins, personal | Response: 0

  Today was one of those days — one of those incredibly long and hard days that makes you want to quit. I had one of those days today. My college friend Vanessa calls it a “Jonah day.” You know, the kind of day that is reminiscent of being vomited on a beach by a whale.

  My bad day full of multiple frustrations started with poor planning yesterday. It’s true. Bad days don’t just happen all at once. Usually a Classic Bad Day is a product of compiling all the ingredients in the recipe we call Failure. I had a video shoot yesterday morning. So I get up, get the kids fed, dressed, socked, shoed, brushed, combed, and buckled. I get the Awana bags in the car, the Operation Christmas Child boxes in the car, the video equipment in the car. But I can’t find the video BAG nor my cell phone which is turned off. So I leave anyway, so that I can show up 10-15 minutes early so I can set up for the video shoot.

  On the way there, I realize I need to call my hubby and ask a technical question but don’t have a phone. (Later I realized my phone was in fact in my purse.) So I get to MOPS, get the camera set up. Do some preliminary shooting. Block the guest speaker from cutting through my video. (yep, that was real smooth). Then I’m interviewing people on video. I have my 3rd person on camera, and Poof the LOW BATTERY signal flashes up, giving me the “dreaded blue screen.” Great. So, now I have a broken camera, a missing bag, a missing cell phone (I still thought), and a couple of Operation Shoe Boxes dumped out into my trunk. I regroup enough to find the media guy, borrow (and eventually temporarily steal) a camera, and finish my mission of shooting testimonies.

  So, I continue with my failure to plan throughout the day. I take on one more thing on my plate and start planning that thing, all the while failing to plan dinner. I was no chef last night; I was merely a warmer. We ate frozen pizza and boxed gnocchi with jarred sauce. My family was lucky I didn’t use paper plates.

  Our boarder who really communicates with us very well (TYVM) announced his plans for the weekend after dinner last night. He would be leaving at 10am Fri. It wasn’t until this morning that I realized he had taken off the entire day of work. So I made breakfast for the 4 of us. The break in the routine started our Classic Bad Day. Normally, he is not present in the mornings — he has already left for work by the time we all get up. So… trying to get out the door before 9am to return the temporarily stolen camera to the church was quite the challenge. Either I’m a poor planner, a poor communicator, a poor leader, a poor parent, or I’m just plain too hard on myself — but trying to get the usual “kids fed, dressed, socked, shoed, brushed, combed, and buckled” seemed to take longer this morning.

  So I left frustrated. I came back and tried to get the children going on a computer game but they didn’t want to use the computer nor the game that I wanted, so I thought, well it’s not a big deal just go with it. BAD IDEA. The number of interruptions to my exercise routine seemed like a million and three. (Of course it was only 3). Trying to get math and reading done after exercising was also a bad idea. Alexis wouldn’t sound out the word “has”; Rachel kept interrupting me with her computer questions; Alexis would just get started pronouncing something and Rachel would blare out, “MOM!!”

  So (if you’re still reading), you wanna know what I did? I threw in the towel. I quit. I quit school for today. It just wasn’t worth the additional frustration.

  We ate leftovers for lunch. I read 3 books to the children. I started sewing. Later I came down to give a snack and noticed the family room had tiny styrofoam balls scattered about — the kind of balls that used to be “berries” on my harvest wreath.

  Fortunately, Today I had dinner planned. and that was the best thing that happened to me all day.

  So, if you’re new to homeschooling, as I am, you will encounter those frustrating days, and you just have to say, “FINE. It’s ok to take a mental health day today.” “Real” teachers get them. And we all know that we will accomplish our goals by the end of the year.  But a good day of homeschooling starts with planning.  And a good day’s worth of plans can easily turn into a week or a month or a year’s worth of plans.   If you have no clue about planning, please check out the “Plan-It” Series from my college friend Dawn.  It’ll be worth your time. Totally.

  Afterall, you really don’t want a Jonah day… Do you?

• The freedom of Submission

  Date: 2009.10.31 | Category: Bible Study, personal | Response: 0

  I just want to say that if you aren’t letting your husband make decisions in your home, then you’re totally missing out. Completely.

  There’s a certain joy and freedom in letting go and letting the man make the decisions. Even if you think he doesn’t care about the outcome itself, if you are wrestling with a decision, I beg you, please let your husband in on your secret struggles and let him decipher the problem.

  The outcome will be resolved quickly, painlessly, and you will have such amazing peace in your soul, that you’ll wonder why you didn’t come up with this idea of submission yourself. Men have this way of cutting through the emotions and knowing what really matters in the long run.

  Of course there will be times that you will be wondering “why on earth do I have to submit to him?” and Lord, are you sure about his decision? Submission isn’t always easy. But it always produces JOY.

  Two examples from this year: replacing the countertops and Halloween. When we went to replace the countertops, Rob wanted Granite. I knew that would be a major expense, and rather than replace the counters with more Formica (or other laminate), I was initially pushing for leaving the counters as they were. But as he continued researching and discussing with me, I could sense that I needed to back off and let Rob do this. As a friend advised me, “If you husband wants to bless you — let him! Don’t worry about the price tag. That is his burden to carry, not yours.” So I have have a granite kitchen. I love it. It looks so professional.

  Our neighborhood is full of children which is wonderful. There’s no shortage of play mates. But our neighborhood is really into Halloween. Several homes “decorate” with pumpkin lights, gravestones, spider webs and other ghoulish motifs. I knew we had to make a decision about whether or not to participate in Halloween and at what level. I have no problem dressing up or eating candy. What I have a problem with is the history of Halloween, and everything that I know goes on with this dark holiday. I have a problem with my girls dressing like a ghost when Jesus is the Author of Life. I spent almost all of September wondering how I was going to deal with this holiday. It’s not like you can pretend not to be home when your 4-yr-olds run to the door every time the bell rings — which would be often in our neighborhood. So, I wrestled, and prayed, and chatted with my girlfriends. Finally the discussion came up at a dinner party and my husband looked with shock at me, “Why don’t you let your husband call the shot on this one?” I sat there speechless. DUH, of course I should let him call the shot on this. Why hadn’t I thought of this sooner? Why did I wrestle for so long on this issue which should have never caused me to lose sleep? It was such a relief to sit down later with Rob, and discuss my feelings and thoughts and have him make the decision for our family. It was only afterwards that the Lord gave me the idea for our family outing today.

• Theology of Food: Overview

  Date: 2009.09.13 | Category: Bible Study | Response: 0

  In preparation for teaching the MOPS group on how to use leftovers, I’ve decided I should attempt to do a study on what the Bible says about food.

  Here are the notes I made in church today:

  1. Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit Gen 3
  2. Communion 1 Cor 11
  3. Jesus is vine/branches Jn 15
  4. Widow with the cruse of oil that never ran out.
  5. Abraham made food when angels appeared to him and gave promise of Isaac
  6. Dietary laws  (leviticus)
  7. Peter’s vision at the Tanner’s house Acts 9
  8. marriage supper of the Lamb Rev
  9. Daniel – refused the king’s food
  10. handwriting on the wall
  11. Esther threw a feast
  12. Jesus told a parable of the dinner
  13. prodigal son was hungry Lk 15

• All There

  Date: 2009.03.04 | Category: Bible Study, personal | Response: 0

  Let not our longing slay the appetite of our living. Wherever you are, be all there.  Live to the hilt every situation you believe to be the will of God. — Jim Eliott

  Tonight I was reminded of this quote, because I found out that a friend of mine overseas lost her grandmother here in the states.  There’s something very difficult about not being there for the funeral of a grandmother.  I was “there” (physically present) for my Grandma’s dying days, but I was actually about 30 days too late.  I had missed the window of lucidity. . . There were things I wanted to say and share and ask which I could not do once I had arrived.   Then I was not around for the funeral.  I wish I had come early and stayed late.

  Yet, looking back, I know I was doing what God wanted me to do.  When you live five hundred or  a thousand or a million miles away from family, it is impossible to drop everything and be there for surgeries, funerals, losses and moves; graduations, weddings, new babies, new homes, and birthday gifts. The help you want to give and the love you want to receive must be given to and received from others.  Sometimes you are here but you wish you were there.

  Living to the hilt isn’t like making instant jello (done in 2 minutes).  I once explained this as living life to the fullest, embracing every opportunity without fear and without reservation.  If I believe God has placed me here, then I stay here (physically and mentally) until the Lord leads me elsewhere.  I do not long to live in any other state, county, suburb, or nation.  Today, Here is home.  I seek to serve those in my life path as the Son of Man would serve them.  I refuse to ride the emotional roller coaster of What Ifs and If Onlys; nor do I allow the lead weight of discontent to drag me down and away from the clear calling of God on my life (however unclear the immediate next step may be).

  Living to the hilt  is embracing each new day with excitement and anticipation at how the Lord will work.  Being “all there” is not just mental alertness or absence of mental illness.  Being “all there” begins with the spiritual exercise of gratitude for the chance to seek Him from my particular geographic location today.  Being all there means fully embracing God’s will for my life today.

• Word Choice

  Date: 2009.01.31 | Category: Bible Study, Twins | Response: 0

  Today for lunch I served Baked breaded Fish, Hash browns, Freezer Coleslaw (thawed), carrot sticks, and Fruit & Yogurt Salad.  Rachel helped with the food prep: she sliced the strawberries, distributed the chopped pear, and scooped the yogurt on each serving.  Alexis cleaned and set the table, served the fruit salad, and distributed the napkins.

  When we sat down and blessed the food, I began to serve the fish and the coleslaw.  Alexis chimes, “Hey, Mom. I want a dunk of that.  Dunk! That’s a funny word.”

  “Yes, Dunk is a funny word.  Are you referring to the sound it makes on your plate?” asked Rob.

  “Yeah… it goes like this…” explained Alexis.

  “Well, actually the correct word is dollop.” I corrected. “Dollop, as in a dollop of cool whip or sour cream.  I dolloped the cole slaw onto your plate. Dunk is for fully submersing something.”

  “Like dunking a cookie in milk” added Rob.

  “Not to be confused with Dip.  Dip means that just a little tip of the food has been put into something. Like I just dipped the corner of my hashbrown into my ketchup,” I explained, holding up my hashbrown as Exhibit A.

  I began to smile.  I looked at Rob, who was also smiling.  “Mushy, Squishy, and ishy,” he said laughing.

  “Exactly what I was thinking!” I responded.

  We were pleasantly recalling the days that Deni spent with us, learning the intricacies of English adjectives. . . . 

  “A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver”
  Proverbs 25:11

• Home Ownership, a reflection

  Date: 2009.01.15 | Category: Bible Study, personal | Response: 1

  I’m not sure when I wrote this post originally but it must have been early in 2008.  Portions of the original have been edited or deleted, the rest I have decided to publish today because I find it thought-provoking.

  “This move to Arlington Heights has been stressful.  all the way around, i am stressed.  before the move, i was stressed about the idea of moving. then everything happened so quickly that the frantic pace was stressing me.  i stressed out about what everyone would think of our moving. ….

  “and trying to find a house is impossible…..  i am tempted to ask God for a sign — an audible instruction for “where to buy our house” .  rob will have to commute to AH daily, no matter where the new church site will be so it’s almost a moot point. but if the church is going to reach out the community around its new location, then it would be nice to have some staff ppl living there.

  “i am really struggling. part of me says, screw the house hunt, rent forever. part of me says, fine just buy an old fixer upper and I’ll work on it.  i can’t sleep at night anyway, so I may as well remove carpet, wallpaper, and 50 yr old appliances. i may as well  take a sledge hammer to the walls to open up the spaces, repaint the remaining walls, and dig up the yard to re- landscape it.  install new bigger windows, replace plumbing, and well shoot just tear down the whole house and start over. the trouble with this plan is that I have “almost 3″ yr olds. not almost 13 yr olds who could actually HELP or stay out of the way by attending school 7 hrs/day.

  “all of this brings me to my search for a “theology of home ownership”.  I haven’t yet built one (LOL no pun intended). but i do know this.  Abraham lived in a tent.  Paul lived in a prison. Jesus didn’t have a place to lay his head. Foxes live in holes. David was a cave man. Samuel stayed in the temple from the time he was 3.  Ruth lived with inlaws and even spent the night in the barn. Esther lived in a palace. Mary went to the hill country. Peter, Andrew, James and John were possibly boat people, and Peter also probably stayed with his inlaws.  does the fact that these ppl lived in another time and another place and another culture have any bearing on my theology of home ownership?  Am I over spritualizing? Am I taking this housing thing way to seriously?  How can I be, if a woman’s place is IN the home?”

  I don’t know if I ever built my theology of home ownership.  But I do know that God placed us in the neighborhood where we now live, in Crystal Lake, a full 40 minute commute from Arlington Heights. Acts 17:26-27 From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. God did this so that men would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from each one of us.  If we ever move again, I hope that I can rest in the sovereignty of God’s plan for us.  Because it’s not really up to me where we live.